Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(231): View more from Michigan

i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.

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(660): View more from Missouri

I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.

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(313): View more from Michigan

well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(704): View more from North Carolina

How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?

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(914): View more from New York

Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.

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(585): View more from New York

You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start

(585): View more from New York

Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...

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(812): View more from Indiana

Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.

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