Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
