these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
