I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
