it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
