I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
