U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
People with herpes should wear stickers.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
