I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Randomize
