i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
