I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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