Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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