Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
