I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
