my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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