i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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