i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Randomize
