i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
