She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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