Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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