i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
