If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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