It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
