brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
