We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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