I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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