Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
