Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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