Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
