How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I want her autograph on my taint
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize