Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
