she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
