question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Are these your boobs on my camera?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
