none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize