Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize