Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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