real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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