Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
