im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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