some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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