Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
