your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize