There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
