I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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