Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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