quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
