that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
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