you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I am naked and annoyed.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
