Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize