and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
