It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
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Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
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What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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