I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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